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Awaking to Immortality

"Awaking to Immortality" (2005)

1. Objectivity Unjust
2. Self-Created Martyr
3. Host of Human Desires
4. Loss of Humanity
5. Break the Disembodied Altar
6. Monologue with the Dust
7. A Moment of Reflection
8. Anhedonia Society

1. Objectivity Unjust

The key to mystery of human behaviour
Guards cruel co-existential truth
Spontaneous life is a vision of a madman
Pressing minds deride with hollow laugh

You are just a function of other functions
Slave of human opinions
The one, who lays my way
With the whip plaited of tears

Subjective truth gives you strength
To live in lie of objectivity
Others� truth is my truth
Your truth is no-one�s truth

You choke with suffering
Rigid vision of yourself in their eyes
Torment of keeping up appearances
Is a whim�s string around your neck

You plunge in the depths of pessimism
Inevitably you are going to discover
The darkest recesses of destiny
Groaning soul is avid for freedom
Drives you to break the bonds
Bastards of human blindness
As a testimony of damn truth
Scream for puppets� attention

Desist from your pathetic attempts
In yoke of filthy reality
We are just powerless actors
In the traveling theater of vanity

2. Self-Created Martyr

Reflection of myself is what I�ve once found in you
When I look at me now I see something you�ll never be
Sculptured by tears and winds of bygone times
With storms at my right and fire tongues at my left
I stand in front of you

Look into my eyes and see superiority � unreachable for you
Hear my laugh knocking down rotten foundations of your hideout

Weak � scared of your own voice
Blind � sleeping drunk with tears
Pathetic � begging for scars from orgy of life
Realize that you�ve never existed

If people search for acceptation in reflections of themselves
Then I�ll become your greatest enemy

Father, what kind of creator are you
Giving birth to crawling crowd
Where everybody sucks salvation
Through the last resort � trust
Which they�ve been presented with

So much blood was lost

Small � jester at the mercy of bored lords
Crippled � never experienced the ecstasy
Ascetic � crucified by imagined sorrows

At the peak of the mountain
Surrounded by the compassionate people
You hammer nails into the feet and palms of your love
But bloody wounds belong to you

Fucking self-created martyr

3. Host of Human Desires

Hypnotic dance of deformed shadows
The dance of morbid visions, demons of decadence
In claustrophobic space of human psyche
Wakes desires of deadly solace up

In mad elation of soul
Insane motions spread the redness
Like a blood, which whiteness is hungry for
Apocalyptic landscape, a storm of colours
Winding lines roll, sparkle with tints of purplish red
Dies irae, fury of the flaming sky
Cover your ears, my friend,
Because with the howl of hyenas
Host of human desires approaches

Schizophrenic sights bury calmness
Unrestrained nightmares, dreams of the madman
Every limit fade away
World of imagination comes into life

Paleness paints the deadly pale face
Sucks all colours out, sucks life out
Contorted mouth yells into emptiness
Scream drills brain, crushes temple
Terror, clouds your gaze
Deprives of strength, paralyses senses, inflicts pain
However, is not the agony what
your miserable body is afraid of
Life is your worst nightmare

In the critical minute of my existence
I call you, hear me begging

Damn self-portrait of the fallen genius
The one brought down from clouds of ideals
Apathetic spurt gives rise to yell
The last scream into void of the steely sky

4. Loss of Humanity

Sacrifice in the name of peace and justice
Forgiveness at the war with depravity
Altruism in response to hate and envy
Martyrdom by the choice�

This is just a desire
Vision of your sick mind
No-one feels it anymore
Loss of humanity

Jealousy in the name of pride and meanness
Loneliness at the war with reality
Ruthlessness in response to sneer and insult
Deception by the choice�
Our live

Degradation of the human race
Morality means nothing now
Profanation of the old values
Humanity is an empty word

Springs of inspiration die
With ethical handicap
No funeral
Illusory happiness
Captured without any rules
No scruples

Insolence in the name of lust and contempt
Apathy at the war with bestiality
Cruelty in response to death and evil
Atheism by the choice�

Never-ending battlefield
Abyss, where your soul hurts
Even you can�t run away
Loss of humanity

The last hope is distortion
Process, which we all feel
It is worthless existence
End of humanity

5. Break the Disembodied Altar

Break the disembodied altar

Raise your head, son of Cain, and look
Where paths treaded by the blind have led you
Turn away and find the forgotten requests
Promised to be carried by the blind out

Standing alone at the crossroads of dead ends
Without heavens above and no hells below
Answer me, why have you turned from wolf to sheep?
Why has the hollow forgiveness become price for your love?

Renounce of worms hatched in heaven
Spit the truths of the mouldy tome out
And recall the pride wiped away with tears
Which have soaked into the dead soil of your faith

Break the disembodied altar

Why do you choke with your own desires?
Why do you drown in the stream of life?
Have you ever thought in whose name you live?
Has anyone seen your face before?

6. Monologue with the Dust

Greyness of dreams brings eternal longing for the colour of hypocrisy
You have been pushed into the arms of lies by terror of your being
Vain hopes, which are fed with your weakness
Your fathers� sins hog-tied minds of this world
Mourn for ignorance and console yourself with faith -
The shield, which protects you against real life
Take a look through the tears at blackness of your heart
And pray for forgiveness, because in presence of the humankind�s crimes
It is a blasphemy to suspect me of existence

You are dependent on finding solace in your extensive treasure,
The one produced by hundreds of dreams and conscious mockeries
Redness of damnation guards your desires
But it is just one of the thousand lies
You renounce yourself to experience redemption
The new vestment of nonsense, which is hard to believe in
Faith is yet a sad necessity
The attempt of burying your eternal loneliness
In ashes of your pangs of conscience

Time of revelation is the time of death
End of illusion is our sentence
You are of the dust,
And you�ll turn to dust again
I�ll follow you

7. A Moment of Reflection

8. Anhedonia Society

Hidden in the restless dream I fight with terror
Dried heart dies in a torment of fast beats
I sew my faded pupils up with thick threads of subconscious
For I sense that my enemy prepares the cruelest of blades

My hollow look, so tired of suffering,
Begs for a ray of sun into the blackness of tear-shaped box
But hysterical prayers raised to the old God
Are just a frightful groan in the valley of shadows

Every motion, every thought deals a dull pain to my senses
Tiredness keeps me in the mental trance
Irritated with trifle I lost desire for singing
Singing, which used to take you to the land of dreams

I balance on the verge of my imagined world
World of possessiveness, world of pain, world of loneliness
I wish to scream, but my voice gets stuck in moans
I am nobody, a dust of nothingness drifting in void

I am the sinner
the cause of failures
I am the burden
the waste of humankind
I am the cripple
my own parasite
I will be the messiah
the liberator of souls

Beware of me, the army of common martyrs
Waiting for the ritual nailing to cross
Under the mask of disease you recognize my dear face
You reach your small trusting hand out to the memories
So vivid now, here, embraced by soothing feelings
But this tenderness is the arms of sick mercy
Beware of me, the army of common desperados
For on the bayonets of love you will find only death


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