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SUPURATION LYRICS
"Incubation" (2003)
1. The Confusion [November]
2. The Old Mirror [December]
3. Incubation [January]
4. The Nameless Boys [February]
5. Witness To 3X3X3 [March]
6. The Father�s Gun [April]
7. Vertigo [May]
8. The Cocoon Sphere [June]
9. The Biological Clock [July]
1. The Confusion [November]
She : "Dear diary it's so stupid" � Tears of fear coruscated my face � Tears of joy course the length of my days � Tainted blood tracks in my veins � Bleak sadness, he will come soon � Will I ever be � Truly wholly free � Of this agony? � It's not left me, this blood of mine today � What would you think of me, Mother, if I should say � (If you should learn about my stains?) � I can see your face, blackened with rage Twisted in hatred (denying the cage I have wrought.) � My bliss drains... � I wish I could say how I became this way! � Stark fear � He will come � Now I want it � Now I sense him � Is he the one? Mother there are dark rings under your eyes � Your hand raised to slap as you realise � I wish I could say � It would be okay. � She (about her diary) : "...He (the embryon) thinks your a therapy...".
2. The Old Mirror [December]
I spy him through the old mirror � Strange this, then, to me � Face to face, it's him that I could see � This was too much! � My eyes clouded, darker, further � Face in my hands � Hands that would not dam � Tears that burned. � I will not magnify his image � I wish I was still yet a child!
3. Incubation [January]
Now I am sure someone else is inside me � Foetus: "...my brain I suppose?"
�I search for him with all of my soul � Surely my image is all he can see
�As I speak of him all the time. � He speaks to me with the tie that binds
� His soft molten voice in my head � Reverberates throughout the walls of my mind � Storms my heart with its gentle song � My mother is going to kill me... � I would too if I was in her place � She would not know what else to do. � She (writing on her diary) : � "...is another way to love me..."
�he faceless ones who dole out pain � Disguised in the pill we take as "life"
My soul entrapped, I strain again �To free it from their torturous grind.
Foetus : "�.my brain I suppose.?.?..
4. The Nameless Boys [February]
Sex at night with nameless boys must go � They hurt me with their promises
� Like their names, their words are dust � And left me bleeding in the street. � I lie where no-one's been before � Away from tawdry rooms and alleys � Secure in knowing he is there � To stay with me forever.
5. Witness To 3X3X3 [March]
Sixteen years since I've been home � And now I'll never leave This edict given, cast in stone � My universe is cubed, deceived.... Obscurity's the cloak I wear � Six faces of my room will bear � Witness to three by three by three � All that they are I'll never be. � My cube is glued to many more � I see them fade towards horizon � And in each one a soul is stored � Grieving, peaceless isolation � Human geometry, irreconciled � The jigsaw of a giant child � That keeps to rules of five and three � And keep complete for all to see. � The faces of my cube become me � Loneliness is symmetry � No self-volition : I have to see Myself reflected to the power of three. � All hope is gone now, as if never had been � Multispace turns silently vertiginous � Parasite and paradise, my new hostfeeds � And I listen, despairingly bilious. � I twist in a helix : my destiny bound � My will not my own, through true clarity found � His coming is imminent: he speaks to me � The pain is inevitable before he can be. � Mindflash of mother � Sadness a lether � Situations snafu* � Sensation of déjà vu... � (* situation normal all fucked up).
6. The Father�s Gun [April]
Pain confines me to bed. � To look beyond the angles � Of this cube not a factor � It's partition a cage in my head. � I feel I'm afloat in my cell � Held by a force that subsumes � I'm stretched till I break � Is it cuboid or spherical, this hell? � And as if to confound me still more � As to what shape and dimension it is �The partition darkens �Tll there was no real horizon at all � I don't know who I am anymore � What will now happen to me? � I cannot now retrace my steps � Backtrack to my blank safety I found my father's gun... � A kick in my belly moves focus � A message from foetus in morse � But what can I do? �The cube has all I have now but dust! � My spirit as dark as this cage � My eyes close to confirm shape now sphere! � I collapse to the floor of this stage � Another vision : � A rose? A cradle? A coffin?
7. Vertigo [May]
Now, I know I am lost- My days are numbered, not powered � It seems that my actions are clear � Abdicating to fate at what cost? � The gun in one hand � My diary in the other. � I am writing the words from my head � There will be few more, eyes are closed � I feel free, now I have chosen; � The humanity in me near dead �Foetus : "...that still be me!!..." I am safe in this sphere � No pain in here... � With eyes tight shut � I can see, sixteen years ago � Mother being just like me! � Not alone anymore � Free from pain of the past � The suffering over � These thoughts in the mind of the last... � I follow orders, now I move to the light
� From which I had fled for so long � I follow his orders, ideas, sensations She : "to keep us always together..." � There is nothing of me. � Is there trial, judge and jury � Beyond the nowtemporal � I do not intend to stay here.
8. The Cocoon Sphere [June]
Foetus speaking to her : � "Still trapped in here � This cocoon sphere I'm bathing in this liquid clear � Wait for her to have courage �To bring us together. � I do not want that life outside! �There are so many things to hide � From the shallow and the fickle � When you're alone mankind means nothing � Just like wind pushed through the trees, � The void is total, bears no pleas. � I want to stay inside warmday � I'm isolated far away -All is dark here inside � I'm being soothed by her heartbeat... Sometimes I speak my mind � In my thoughts her I find � She loves me, then I see �A dim light flickening in front of me � Glacial cold invades me, being eaten by the light � It's as if I'll cease to be, nothing else matters
�No will, no fight." � -end of transmission-foetus'heartbeats.
9. The Biological Clock [July]
No chance to return to the world where I was born � The moment has to be right-To move on into that dim light- I'm waiting forthe moment...
� No wish to fall back into cubes and powers! � My biological clock has a voice � It's seems that it holds my last choice. � It's time to reunite us.
� The barrel of the gun on this rounded womb � The spark of the life, inside me entombed � I write my last thought � Before I merge with this glimmer I sought � That lives only in my mind. � No turning away from the glean : It obsesses � In ghastly mime � I pull trigger first time � I'm waiting to be free � No anguish in me as I sprawl on the floor � I use my last breath to end it all. � I turn the gun towards my face � Please grant me some warmth; evergrace � She : "I I'm so sorry..." � forgive me... She : "jesus..." I don't have the choice anymore... � Forgive me, I'd rather die, remember me, goodbye...
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