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ANOMY LYRICS

Disquietude

"Disquietude" (2003)

1. Playground
2. HatredAndContempt
3. Mountains Of Madagascar
4. Cyclothymia
5. Bile
6. Intent
7. Bleeding Once Again
8. Inertia
9. Gothic Winter
10. Epilogue







1. Playground

somewhere there's a field where the children play
all the world's evil a lifetime away
but at the door there is a man
and it may be something she'll never understand

life’s little tragedies don't compare
to all the suffering she will bare
sometimes life seems so long
if she's going to make it she must be strong

i know she's out there
i feel her pain
she'll never forget
it'll never be the same
i know she's out there
trying to find her way
so very far from where the children play

every moment the feeling of regret
if she could have anything she would forget
she is not alone but i wish she were
there's too much pain for such a tiny world




2. HatredAndContempt

put all my hope in an empty box
etheric dreams and wishful thoughts
but it's a cage with concrete wall
an abyss and endless halls

misanthropy anomy
i loath humanity
misanthropy
i loath humanity

i did my homework and i learned to think
I opened my eyes i do not blink
see this world for what it is
wasted hope bread and circus

pathetic people and their pointless lives
visceral images i despise
sports politics religion
useless distractions hallucinogens




3. Mountains Of Madagascar

soul's exposed a wayward rock
shivers from cold and flakes from rot
through a mask i see her face
her eyes stare blankly into space

this blood i bled for you
these tears i shed for you
my life i gave to you
my life i lived for you

lips speak of forgiveness forced words of commitment
black hole gravity crushes reality post event
malignant tumor the cancer grows
the mind may forget but still she knows

stained
stained forever
can't escape history
stained
soiled forever
can't forget the memories

beautiful forest the cedars stand tall
a moment lacking forethought the peaks slowly fall
mountains of madagascar slip into the ocean
painful regret a perfect existence broken




4. Cyclothymia

suspended over black
isolated
seemingly thick water
shimmers in green
separated from sea
painful differences
the soundless depths beckon
solitude
from hope and fear
plummet head first
all is known
distinct and the same
eternity in a moment
the moment too quick
a wish to stay longer
denied
necessity to return
a separated soul
like an addiction
never content




5. Bile

a black folder for my black thoughts
dark thoughts filled with smiles of you
i was lost but you found me
i had forgotten how to live
all i want a surprise package
all i could ask for i found in you
i saw you today you looked so good
your smile still is lovely
though i know what it means now

these clouded eyes i see through
cataract fantasies become real
i don't need love just someone to love
i am just a body that has learned to talk
i am pathetic what was i thinking
how can i fool myself over and over again

he sees where he is in a cave going down
he knows the lights behind him
but he just can't turn around
he's been heading down this way
for maybe far too long and in his desperation
he just wants to end this song




6. Intent

points of light illuminate
this torn existence
a blistered soul scorched by
my good intentions

her aspirations innocently cast
reality implodes
sadistic fate it suffocates
despondence only grows
sweet communion polluted now
the ugliness of trust
bitter words and battle scars
i struggle for what was

the gravity of knowledge
i look at my reflection
reminisce of beauty
consumed by my good intentions




7. Bleeding Once Again

seems i finally reached
the end of the circle
never thought it was possible
but here i am

is it just another loop
i'm sure it's not
breaking the shackles
was the hardest part

do you cut me open
so i will bleed again
then put your arms around me
and hold me like a friend
say your words of wisdom
but now i understand
i can only laugh now
for weeping then

free but i'm not moving
there's a hole where the sail should be
time to swim i don't think so
could only go back there anyway




8. Inertia




9. Gothic Winter

gothic winter and all things bad
the scribbles on paper of the dreams i've had
that question looms with anvil weight
black is her heart and a love of hate

magnetic attraction between polar spheres
a wish of her wants denied all these years
feelings fester a hint of gray
dark conversion this is her way

a frostbitten soul buried deep in my chest
steel ribcage and wire mesh
an iron core a blackened heart
my human side tears me apart

pale
almost fragile
beauty
hidden under wrap
smooth black velvet
hugs where I wish to
a perfect embrace treated tenderly
soft breath
whisks me away to a dreamscape
where all wonderful colors
come together in envy
of my dear black




10. Epilogue

this is the life
that i have lived
haven't done everything right
but i'm proud of it

many beautiful friends
i can't complain
if that were all i needed
i'd have nothing more to gain

life's precious memories
i've tried to forget
all i can remember
is pain and regret

happiness has past me
i no longer look for love
don't expect to live a long time
but i've lived long enough

 


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