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PARAMAECIUM LYRICS
"A Time to Mourn" (1999)
1. A Moment
2. I'm Not to Blame
3. My Thoughts
4. Betrayed Again
5. Enter in Time
6. Live for a Day
7. Even the Walls
8. Unceasing
1. A Moment
Life is a moment
2. I'm Not to Blame
The night becomes the day
The darkness is swept away
My life became the death
The pain was in my last spoken breath
They always rely
Too much on me
They hide and think I can't see
They offer up their lies
I see it lurking behind their eyes
I'm not to blame
The door has been left wide
They have been left to decide
It seems the more I gave
The less I got, the more that they crave
They always rely
Too much on me
They hide and think I can't see
They think it's all a game
And when it's done they call out my name
But I'm not to blame
I held the will to live
But I decided to give
In ways they could decry
But choose instead to watch as I die
They always rely
Too much on me
But they don't realize
They always rely
So much on me
That they don't realize
It's not up to me
3. My Thoughts
My life, my days, they all just seem to pass away
My dreams, my thoughts
They all just seemed to come to nought
I find each day has its own little story
Each waking hour its own little glory
The pages say that my soul has been borrowed
The night time calls to my aching,
Tomorrow never comes
My life, my days, they all just seem to pass away
My dreams, my thoughts
They all just seemed to come to nought
My life, my days, they all just seem to pass away
My thoughts, my dreams,
All are seldom what they seem
Given time all the pain seems to melt away
Even time cannot heal that which
Promised to stay for evermore
Given time even pain I can hold in sway
I will wait with it hidden then loosed on the final day
At times I've hated the lives of the living
Wished all could see their salacious forgiving
The pages say that my soul has been borrowed
Can't spend my life
Making sure that tomorrow never comes
My life, my days
My dreams, my thoughts
At times I've hated the lives of the living
4. Betrayed Again
I have been betrayed again
All my rights have been denied
All my friends have turned me in
I have been betrayed by them
Even though I have done my all
Even tempered I've thought it through
Though in pain had the wherewithall
To suspect they were hurting too
In the night time I cry
In the night time I lie
In the night time I die
In the night time I cry that I have been betrayed
I have been betrayed again
Silent curses filled my mind
Terror waits, I can't condemn
(Though) I have been betrayed by them
Patient minded in certitude
That this anguish will over time
Take the remnants of servitude
To the heights of the near sublime
In the night time I cry
In the night time I lie
In the night time I die
In the night time I cry that I have been betrayed
5. Enter in Time
From the outside all appeared serene
The garden framing a dreamlike scene
In the beginning the house was new
The rooms were warm there was much to do
I opened up the door and walked through
And maybe now I've come to see the light is whiter
And the life will enter in time
It's always whiter and the life is ever in time
Gravely the old man with greyish hair
Waiting sadly beneath the stair
Frail hands reaching out anew
Called for me, bid me thereinto (I hate myself)
I opened up the door and walked through
And maybe now I've come to see the light is whiter
And the life will enter in time
It's always whiter and the life is ever in time
All I have left is this memory
Thoughts of how loving used to be
All I have left is this tainted view
Painfully, I'm in love with you.
I open up the door and walk through
And maybe now I've come to see the light is whiter
And the life will enter in time
It's always whiter and the life is ever in time.
6. Live for a Day
The light of morn pours through the window
To settle on pages torn
The book, so old, vainly the truth waits for
Someone to read but is untold
Time is running out for the answer is clearer now
Behind the ordinary lives something quite impure
A latent visionary sees that which can't endure
They take away the sadness, they take away the pain
They say she'll never have to think for herself again
Live for the day, live life the way you want to
Give what you may
But don't let them take life from you
Too young, too shy, but even her ancestors
Knew not when they would die
The sands of time slipping away
Whilst she meditates on her last crime
Time is running out for the answer is clearer now
Behind the ordinary lives something quite impure
Holy they masquerade and purport to hold the cure
They take away the sadness, they take away the pain
They say she'll never have to think for herself again
Live for the day, live and do what you want to
Give what you may
But don't let them take life from you
Live for the day, live life the way you want to
Give what you may
But don't let them take life from you
They're counting the sands of time
They're touching the sound of moonlight
They're sealing the book of life
They're taking the truth from time
Behind the ordinary lives something quite impure
The taste of innocence found
That taste which can't endure
They take away the sadness, they take away the pain
They say she'll never have to think for herself again
Live for the day, live and do what you want to
Give what you may
But don't let them take life from you
Live for the day, live life the way you want to
Give what you may
But don't let them take life from you
7. Even the Walls
Faded by the hands of time
Faint echoes of my childhood dream
The images of days gone by
Are seldom what they seem
The candlelight spells out my name
The breeze from below leads the dance of the flame
Suddenly no one recalls
Yesterday's men have vacated the halls
And they all stay away from the home of their youth
And they all say they pray but pretend with the truth
I know I once was like them, old in word and deed
But my youth survived and revived
The ravages of need
Never has an open door
Presented me itself to claim
Even though the walls persist
In singing out my name
Even the walls know my name
The candlelight flickers the dance of the flame
Suddenly no one recalls
All of my deeds are adorning the halls
And the way that I've lived
Makes the world that I've known
And I know what I give I must give on my own
For it seems each room holds the key
To open other doors
As I make my way through the house
I'm finding more and more
Folded years before this day
The dust has found its chance to fall
The note from one of loving thoughts
Was never read at all
Even the walls know my name
The candlelight flickers the dance of the flame
Suddenly no one recalls what they said
Yesteryear's heroes are waking up dead
And I owe my whole life to the name on the page
And I look to my wife in the midst of my age
We both have lived with the thought
Of travelling afar
For this house is old and our home
Will find us where we are
8. Unceasing
Life is unceasing
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