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MESS AGE LYRICS
"Self-Convicted" (2002)
1. Among The Empty Walls
2. Fulfiled With Nothing
3. Infected By Deflections
4. the EXIsTence DOOR
5. C.O.L.D.
6. Post Scriptum
7. Devoured With Famished Eyes
8. The Scarlet Rings
9. Kill The Falsehood
10. Waiting For Miracle
1. Among The Empty Walls
River of words is flooding my mouth!
I can't say out any of them
I'm fighting but I don't know with whom
So I walk away - far away - in silence...
I've sensed a touch of an invisible hand
A blow of wind in the void of my dreams
A picture painted by a picture
Like words - one after another
Screamed out around
through the shut mouth
The noise has come back
As well as the scream and pain
Hiding among the words
I lose control over the world
I let hollow moans out
Resounding like echo...
Among the empty walls
I've heard a scream
Which woke me up from a dream
Or maybe not ?
I open my eyes filled with a strange relief
Which is mixed with pain
...Penetrating every cell of my consciousness
I thought it was just a dream - but no
Terrible pain has paralyzed me
My thoughts have vanished
Someone has buried me...
I'm not you -you aren't me
You can't escape from that
...Just understand
My scattered mouth won't say a word anymore
My scattered eyes won't see a thing
Rusted spine of consciousness has abandoned me
I can only hear the tears mixed with ground
Rhythmically thrown into a ditch onto the coffin
2. Fulfiled With Nothing
Empty forms are dying
Disappear in time
We have never lived in
So many rules created by profanity
I can feel them hunting
Each sensible gesture is beaten back
By a rigid response in the face of the law
I'm trying to find any rules
Or borrow them to survive the next day
The future has been sold
And all the truths have become dead
...Just dead...
Sick elementary snobbish rule
Has conquered the world like hazard
It's like a magnet below a roulette
I'm searching for any relation
The bounds between mystery
and materialism
I wish I could forget that what I see
Is pseudoempathy
Sick of indifference
Mad genocide has become ecstatic feast
Organized with taste and grand style
It's become daily standard
...Just like the words...
Are pain and insecurity all that we have?
Are they all that was given to us?
3. Infected By Deflections
I saw birds
Some motherfuckers fed them with dirt !
I watched them die of thirst !
I saw some fags
In speechless orgy of sights
I threw up
I watched somebody cover them with gas
... And burn !
In empty gestures I tangled my hands
Breaking my fingers
Pushing them into my mouth
No deviation deserves a life !
Let it live what should be alive
No deviation deserves a live
I saw some prick
Beating an old and blind dog
Till it fell unconscious
It's crime was to shit on the floor ...
I saw pedophiles
Observing little kids
Then I heard them being skinned
And thrown to the pigs
They turned their heads with disgust !
I saw the Hindu dancer
Few stinking Arabs grabbed her ass
I watched her wipe away
Their blood from her face
Let it live what should be alive
No deviation deserves a live
4. the EXIsTence DOOR
Trying to exist in a suspicious world
Trying to exist in disappointing world
Searching the exist door out of this madness
I'm looking for a place for myself
Lost inside
I ask a question :
What am I doing here ?
But the answer is straight
I'm a part of a puzzle
Fully unknown to me
I'm the background of events
Shocking reality time after time
What can I do to free
My soul and mind of this chains
I'm the element thinking that
Can change anything
But truly I can't - I'm nobody ...
No reality - just illusion
The picture of the world created
By the sick mind which has to be cured
Immediately !
Explosions of lights
Time has finished
The end has come
Disease completed it's work
... I'm gone
But I'll be back soon
I'll be back in your dreams
And the invisible circle of events
Will repeat again
So answer yourself a question
What will happen when disease gets you ?
Trying to exist in a suspicious world
Searching the exit door out of this madness
I'm looking for a place for myself
Lost inside
I found'em
I found my exit door !
5. C.O.L.D.
Colour the night madman
And fill it with dreams of days
When the touch of the sunlight
Is a soothing medicine for coma
See cool colour madman
And never let it die!
See cool colour as rationalism of human thoughts
Let it penetrate you deep inside
Let it become one
It will lead you
Through the land of shadows
And it won't let you forget!
The world - in cool colours
The world - in two dimensions
See cool colour madman
And never let it die!
6. Post Scriptum
7. Devoured With Famished Eyes
From a child a monster was born
Fed with fear and freeze
...Spiteful - Indifferent - Mortal...
His mind exploded
And no one could set it up into one wholly
Just an animal instinct was left
-skinny and starving-
He was strolling through the crowded streets
Licking the corners of his mouth
Sensing his sight with
Overwhelming amount of meat
...Exciting over the smell of a future prey...
He managed to learn intelligence
Or smuggled it to his head
When everyone was occupied with themselves
He got the prey but he hesitated for a while
But skinny and starving the instinct predominated
Didn't let him hesitate any longer
From a desk by a window
He took out the gun
And let her look at him for the last time
She saw only his famished eyesight
And smelled the supper in the air
Now she knew she was the main dish!
Insanity - Lie
Ordinary human fallibility
Why is it so easy to escape from responsibility?
Unconsciously we are waiting for our prey
Almost sensing its smell...
8. The Scarlet Rings
I've opened my scars
More than they could expect
And danced ...
Their melodious singing so delicately
Cooled the heat of my veins
It's one of these moments
When throbbing tips of my nerves
Explode in colorful symphony
That day I fell on the ground and died!
That day the golden autumn leaves
Buried my body and my mind
That day I laid on the ground and died!
It's one of these moments
When throbbing fingertips
Drop after drop surrender the desert of my lips
I didn't touch the scarlet rings
Although they circled around me
Tempting beasts whispered into my ear
To let them wrap around my wrists
9. Kill The Falsehood
Do you ever wonder what
right is ?
I question everything !
Whenever I stand before painted and decomposing
Edifices of your lofty moral
dogmas
I describe them with letters of bright contempt
Look and notice - that's all a lie!
Look and notice - that's all a lie!
The faith in one false rule
Causes all the foolishness !
As the surroundings change
None of human ideas is certain !
Use your life - here and now
That's why whenever a lie
Builds a throne
Let it be attacked
With no mercy or regret !
Let it be thrown into the darkness
Among dead gods - dead empires
- dead philosophies
And all the other collection
of waste and rubbish
Supposed truth is nothing
but pure fiction !
Don't I redeem myself with
my own mind and body?
Now it's time to disperse all doubts
The blind's desire goes beyond time
And all the conceptions
Life - is an enormous satisfaction ...
Death - is a great moderation ...
10. Waiting For Miracle
My own hands get insane
They try to clean something
It still exists but you can't grab it
My mind can't breathe
In solitude I lie on the edge of the world
Reality didn't expect
this from me, didn't taste me
Waiting it's so hard
And it lasts so fucking long
Waiting for miracle
Pass so fucking slowly
Perfect insanity of this world embracing me
In burning sun we creep like snakes
Someone put his fingers
into black trace
None of us had a chance
to breathe
All I can see is just a cheap
substitute of this life
But my mind can't breathe...
Waiting for miracle
Pass so fucking slowly
Perfect insanity of this world embracing me
In solitude I lie on the edge of the world
Reality didn't expect
this from me, didn't taste me
But I know it became a part of me...
Waiting for miracle
Pass so fucking slowly
Perfect insanity of this world
embracing me
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