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GWAR LYRICS
"You're All Worthless And Weak" (2002 Live album)
1. Salamanizer
2. Babyraper
3. Jagermonsta
4. Sleazy Sells The Earth
5. Think You Outta Know This
6. Death Pod
7. I'm in Love with a Dead Dog
8. Nitro-Burnin' Funny Bong
9. Penguin Attack
10. War Toy
11. Love Surgery
12. The Private Pain of Techno Destructo
13. Crush, Kill, Destroy
14. Slaughterama
1. Salamanizer
Here's a little something from a God to a slave,
I never should of been let out the fucking microwave!
We're on this planet and we're running a muck,
I should give a shit but I don't give a fuck!
Ever since I was a scumdog, I blew a cum-wad.
I need a mother-fucking suckadickalickalong!
Burning a mall or two, blowing the load I spew.
You don't wanna fucking fuck me? I'll Fuck you!
This is your ass, and I'm in it.
My man sexy will fuck you up in a minuet.
With an axe, sword, mace, pike your limbless.
Then I'll fuck your ass till its rimless!
[Chorus:]
Oh! You humans always screaming!
Oh! As you suckle on my semen!
Oh! And the shit is always steamin'
A drunk, a pervert, a junkie and a sodimizer.
But you can call me the salaminizer
Give unto give unto give unto give unto
My life is a luxury, so filled with hate.
I got fifty slaves heaping maggots on my plate.
From my fortress in Antarctica I watch the world die
On my Sony Trinitron that's switched to channel 5.
Back on the road, its no lie....
Stupid fucking humans pay money to die!
Crushed in the pit, nailed to the stage
I only suck the souls that are underage.
[Repeat Chorus]
2. Babyraper
Babyraper, sperm creator
Hulking, brutish masturbator
Babyraper, emasculator
Fleshy flap valve navigator
Never leave me,
Babyraper
Melted cum ejaculator
Spackled filth evaporator
High colonic spackulator the
Babyraper the Babyraper
My quest for sex consumes all my life
Being a god I do what i like I know it hurts you when I fuck a child
Cum-sumed with cumming I've simply gone wild
Drinking and drowning in lakes full of lust
I'll still jerk off even when I cum dust
My sex is my hatred
My penis a tool
My balls are imploding I'm playing the fool
My butt crack is folding
The crap that it's holding I heap it all over the stool
Oh, Babyraper I'm the fucking
Babyraper I'm the guy who stiffed the waiter
Mangled public flagellator
Turgid bowel exaggerator
Fleshy flap-valved gladiator
3. Jagermonsta
If you look at it you'll get drunk
Frothing mass of filthy chunk
Bloodshot eye and boiling spew
To kick the ass of punks like you
Seeking ancient wisdom, drinking with the gods
Rolling in the gutter, craving bloated bloody scrod
Where it came from none can say
Though they do so anyway
Memories of braincells lost
Promoting drunken holocaust
Try - to tame the fury of the Jagermonsta
Drinking, stinking, falling down
Acting like a fucking clown
A drunk who got what he deserved
At least his corpse is well-preserved
The Jagermonster comes to slay
By making you get drunk today
Then drive your car until it skids
Into a busload of retarded kids
Who burn alive, you drunken fuck and then get hit by another truck
Bleeding retards in the dirt
The funny things that you're not hurt
The coops don't come, you get away
You'll live to drink another day...
Hooray! Every stupid thing I do the Jagermonster tells me to
Bring forth now the virgin, soon her flesh to flay
Oh, she's not a virgin?
Still, we'll kill her anyway
That means we can fuck her
And fuck her we will
Then we will go get drunk and find
Someone else to kill
Drunken vengence from the grave
Hooves are flailing, nailing slaves
Beware the power of the Jagermonster!
4. Sleazy Sells The Earth
5. Think You Outta Know This
I'm the manager with the mostest
I clear the profits from the concert grosses
I make it snow up GWAR noses, so now they follow me like I'm Moses
I'm not a Jew but God has chose us
So now I'm sitting on the riches of Croesus
I'm Sleazy and I think you outta know this!
The girlies love me cause I wear the right clotheses
They see the bulges when I strike the right poses
Pull my pants down and you ask me can you blow this
I say yes if you want halitosis
I can't help my pork's got trigonosis
I been plookin' a shoney's hostess
I'm Sleazy and I think you outta know this!
Everybody rip everybody else off
Everybody rip everybody else off
Everybody rip everybody else off
Everybody rip, rip everybody off
Think you outta know this!
Their trying something that they hope you don't notice
A moral oligarchy that is bogus
You know you're there when your family is homeless
You'll be beat in the streets with hoses
The grays are waiting underground while they clone us
They got a deal with the Masons to dispose us
Toxic waste causes cancer by osmosis
H.I.V. is crawling up your hoses
I'm the man with the guts to expose this
And people follow me like I'm Moses
So before you think it's hopeless
I'll start a coup right under their noses
Now they know that they can't control us
So don't forget the man who broke this
I'm Sleazy and I think you outta know this!
6. Death Pod
Death Pod comes from the sky - it does
Through the space, through the stone
Where the Master grows his clones
Where the legions wage eternal war
We were born in this place
Slaughtering race after race
We were part of
The Scumdogs of the
Universe
[Chorus:]
Hey Hey! Hey Hey! Hey Hey! Hey Hey!
The Death Pod is leaving
The Death Pods dismissed
The Death Pod is coming
The Death Pod is pissed
Death Pod comes from the sky - it does
The Master he gave us tools to despoil all he ruled
Plasma cannons spewing death on anything that dared protrude
But we craved for power, the wars been getting sour
The Pod was built, millions kilt, and something that could kick my ass
[Chorus]
Sucking the scrod, blowing my wad
Blowing my wad all over God Dismissed!
Foolish mortal you didn't barge in on the power of the Death Pod did ya?
Huh, huh? Well now you shall receive:
The heat-seeking moister missile Death Pod comes from the sky - it does
The day it came, the blood was rain
We harvested eternal pain
The battle raged for a billion years
But through the burning corpses pall
It was revealed that GWAR would fall
And were banished to this miserable mudball planet.
7. I'm in Love with a Dead Dog
When I first met you, I knew I loved you
Now that one and one is two, I don't wanna cum inside of you
Now I kiss your lips
Now I mount your hips
Now I read your mind, your slimey hind- Sublime!
I'm feeling the peeling, mind reeling
I race unto the plague
I'll bring you a big coat of butter- to slick your dead dick way
I'm in love with a dead dog...
Paw in fist we stalk through the rutabaga garden
We've been to the clinic, we know our love is clean
We walk together, but fill up separately
We share a cheese ball, we just do it all
The butter so bitter, the shitter, well it gapes vacantly
The higher the litter, the shitter, has just righted three...
(The death of Pookie)
You begin to bore me, with your breath like rubber
You scream "Don't stop"
I hope you don't pop
I'm in love, with a shove, meaty glove.
8. Nitro-Burnin' Funny Bong
Ahhh...sweet youth
The joys of becoming a teenage prostitute
Or in my case a blood-crazed gladiator
Til I got stuck on this planet and got hooked
on the weed and the crack and the booze and the pills and the speed
And the sex and the mud and blood and the shit
Let's go hit the
Nitro-burning funny bong
Just one hit, your life goes wrong
Nitro-burning funny bong
Another stupid stoner song
Fat and lame
The claws have been clipped and the tigers been tamed
By a bong, and a schlong
Yes now we have all seen how games can go wrong
My brains filled with bees and my cock is diseased
Laden with pus it hangs well past my knees
A swarm of narcotics could get me through this
My manager's gonna be pissed
Let's go hit the
Nitro-burning funny bong
Just one hit, your life goes wrong
Nitro-burning funny bong
Another stupid stoner song
Oh, can you take it
Yeah, do a monster
Oh, can you deal with it?
We won't respect you unless you get high with the boys
Now I'm old
Strapped in my cell as I cultivate mold
In the twilight of my years
I am still a drug addict
I'm sucking all night long on a ten foot bong
Moistened with lotion,
wrapped in a sarong I live like a king
but you know that I act like a faggot
Once was a warrior, now just a sponge
High all the time got a dick like a muskellunge
My glorious destiny it turned to shit
Can I get another hit?
From the Nitro-burning funny bong
Just one hit, your life goes wrong
Nitro-burning funny bong
Another stupid stoner song
Oh, can you take it
Yeah, do a monster
Oh, can you deal with it?
We won't respect you unless you get high with the boys
9. Penguin Attack
THEY ATTACK
THEY ATTACK
They are on a rampage
Unleashed from ancient time
Stumbling from the ice age
Marching side by side
Beaks of steel are flaming
Women are enraged
Sky of death is flaming
Women get engaged
They were born of atomic steel
Life and death to them seemed so unreal
Slashing at the ramparts
Hurling ton's of shot
Shopping now at Wal Mart
Smoking tons of pot
They are on a rampage
They were first to fight
They would write a new page
If they could only write
They were born of atomic steel
They attack
Life and death to them was so unreal
They attack
C'mon baby, kick 'em in the ding - ding
Trouble on the double's what it b-b-b-b bring bring
They were born of atomic steel
They attack
It's a penguin attack
So get back
They were born of atomic steel
Life and death to them was so unreal
They attack.
armored phalanxes
flanking maneuvers
vomiting terror
Gibsons and Hoovers
Blasted by fusion
Kicked in the head
just to make sure
we chopped up their dead
It's a penguin attack
They were born of atomic steel
Life and death to them was so unreal
Stumbling from the ice age
They were last in flight
They would write a new page
If they could only write
Rumbling from the ice age
They were last in line
They would start a new age
If they could just take time
It's a penguin attack
C'mon baby, kick him in the ding-ding
Trouble on the double's what it b-b-b-b-bring bring
They attack
It's a penguin attack
They were born of atomic steel
They attack
Life and death to them was so unreal
They attack
10. War Toy
Churning through the bestial muck, acosmic forklift rules my throbbing asshole
The all-eye says you are the right slave
To be my anal knave
Tounge in my anal cave
Boy!!
You're just a war toy
Just my little anal butter boy
Oh I'm so filled with joy, now I know glee
10 million hosebags every day
They die for me to have my way
Surely it is their deaths they seek, to brave my toxic
Anal reek
Cause I'm so glad he is among us
I'm so glad he is a fungus
I'm so glad
He is among us
Philled condoms
My nipples explode!!!!
You're just a war toy
Let's all go drink and kill and fart
Yeah sure it's fun but is it art? (Toughie.)
The all-eye sees the butt disease
Humanity - is on their knees with little boys...
11. Love Surgery
12. The Private Pain of Techno Destructo
13. Crush, Kill, Destroy
Everything that ever was, and all that there will ever be
Flesh and blood and stick and stone, all is laid to waste by me
I crush you as I would a fly
I kill you and I watch you die
Destroying everything you cherish, masturbating as you perish
Crush, kill, destroy, crush, kill, destroy, destroy!
I was first and shall be last, slaying all who cross my path
Toppling your gleaming towers, bathing you in golden showers
I crush you as I would a fly
I Kill you and I watch you die
Destroying all I find offending, devastation never ending
14. Slaughterama
With a battle cry go forth which is
"Give the people what they want."
And what the people want could only be the senseless slaughter
of the gutter-slime that litters this nation for cash and prizes.
Yes, this is the show where people bet their lives to win something big.
Cause when your life is shit, then you haven't got much to lose on
Slaughterama!
This next geek is guilty of the following:
A Grateful Dead life for which he's been allowing.
Tried to tell us "Give peace a chance."
Met the National Guard and he shit in his pants.
Its not you imagination, its not a bad trippie, yes thats him -
Its the big smelly hippy!
Hello Mr.Hippy, nice to meet ya.
Hey, got a little shit between your toes.
How's things at the ol' manure factory?
How's little Tofu? What!?
She grew another head?
Well, ya gotta lay off that LSD y'know,
kinda makes your offspring goofy-looking.
So, how do ya hide money from a hippy?
Put it under the soap.
I'm sorry but that answer wasn't in time,
you're gonna have to put your mouth on this.
Whoa! I blew your head clean off.
Good thing I was such an expert shot with the National Guard back in Penn State.
There's nothing like hippie hunting.
My dad always use to take me with Lee Harvey Oswald.
All right, we're rocking now.
Worlds biggest hair,
worlds tightest pants got no circulation but you still can't dance.
Fashion is a statement and sometimes a risk.
Every fashion had its faults, but yours is the pits.
Always in black, looks like he's dead -
Here's the art-fag lying on his death-bed.
Hello Mr. Art-Fag, come on out here.
Say, what a hairdo. Its awfully big.
As big as the.. the..
the Hindenburg and it will go up just as fast if I put this lighter to it.
But no, I'm gonna hold out and ask you this question:
What ever happened to Eddie Munster?
I'm looking at him!
Oh, Oderus help the boy with his hairdo there.... ooh, its getting ripped off.
Ow, you know that's gotta hurt.
Hey, what's Oderus trying to do with his face?
Is that a face-lift?
No, he's pulling that face clean off.
Ahhhhh. Help that sod outta here..
Gave up pussy, stopped to a toot.
Now you can't wait to give someone the boot.
Elbows and knuckles, all you knows how.
Follows the heard, just another cow.
Brain full of shit, boots full of lead.
Straight from Hitler's ass it's a nazi skinhead.
Hello Mr.Nazi Skinhead how'ya doin'?
How's Geraldo's nose? Still broken? W
ell it's good to see ya still on the job.
Y'know when you're mugging talk show commentators in bathrooms,
always remember to draw the swastika turning to the right,
not to the left, always to the right.
Why do nazi skinheads wear red suspenders anyway? H
e doesn't have to tell you.
Time to give this nazi skinhead one more haircut,
real close to the shoulders like.
Whoa! His heads been decapitated.
Look at all that PSI in he aorta artery.
Whoa! Is he a gusher or what?
Well, ladies and gentlemen that's all for this week.
We've killed everyone worth killing, hope you do the same.
We'll Be back next week for another edition of Slaughterama.
It's full of existential despair.
It's full of people who just don't care.
Don't feel sorry for them.
They've chosen there own pathetic life.
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