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FAXED HEAD LYRICS
"Chiropractic" (2001)
1. Rest Stop Cleaning
2. Demon's Chills
3. Deathly Peace
4. The Four Freshmen
5. Farmer Ferdinand Hudson
6. Mr. Bus Driver
7. Chiropractic
8. Bring the Dead Boy Peace
9. Coalinga Love
1. Rest Stop Cleaning
Off of Highway Five
I won't tell you the exit
Is a filthy rest stop
Men are having sex at
They leave condoms on the ground
For innocent dogs to eat
They leave syringes in the grass
For stepping on with bare feet
Kids from my home town
Busted for petty stealing
Find themselves sentenced
To rest stop cleaning
I don't want to be the kettle
That called the pot black
But this rehabilitation scheme
Is the wrong attack
Kids need role models
Like the Four Freshmen or Mercyful Fate.
Punish them with rest stop cleaning
And beware the monsters you create
Kids from my home town
Punished by their very birth
Let them work fast food jobs
Let them prove their worth.
2. Demon's Chills
Got demon's chills
Though it's hot as Hell
Should've ignored Pepe's coupon
Should've stuck to Taco Bell
Pepe Gonzalez cooked up some bad food
Pepe Gonzalez didn't wash the dishes
Pepe Gonzalez didn't check the date on the sour cream
These homey little businesses are not what they seem
Should have heeded the warning
Posted by the county on the door
I've been throwing up all morning
My stomach muscles are sore
3. Deathly Peace
Pills, pills, dreaded pills
Spread for all to see
Pills, pills, so many pills
Seen by none but me.
Tears, tears, painful tears
Flowing for all to see
Tears, tears, so many tears
Seen by none but me.
Pain, pain, deathly pain
Shown for all to see
Pain, pain, so much pain
Seen by none but me
Death, death, peaceful death
There for all to see
Death, death, so much death
Seen by none but me
Pills and tears and pain and death
In me, for all to see
Dreaded, painful, peaceful death
Ignored by all but me
The pills give me my means of death
The tears for a life to cease
The pain for no one caring enough
And death to bring me peace.
4. The Four Freshmen
They came from Indiana
Singing four-part harmony
They played their own horns
And introduced the "theme LP"
When I tried to give up sniffing glue
Their music soothed my swollen brain
If I am to move forward in life
I must demonstrate greater range
I admire the Four Freshmen
I stenciled their faces on my leather jacket
I admire the Four Freshmen
When they came to Reno last year
My parents released me to see the show
Proud of my newfound diversity
Fans themselves; happy to go
But there was only one Freshman left
The others had quit and died
I may appear a physical and emotional mess
But I am a sensitive man inside.
5. Farmer Ferdinand Hudson
Now it is dawn and a new day is born
But with a trail of despair
The new day was shining but many had gone
Farmer Ferdinand Hudson had lost much more than he'd won
He sat by a table and cried in his rum
The cobwebs hung heavy and dreary beside
All that looked at him could barely decide
He passed for one day so to sleep in that night
And early that morning he died
6. Mr. Bus Driver
Sexy thong bikinis
Are the latest rage
I package them in small bags
I make minimum wage
Insert a square of cardboard
Sticker the front, and I'm through
Most of us who work here
Start the day by sniffing glue
Mr. Bus Driver
Hurry it along
Four days straight now
I've done wrong
I've been late for my job
Packing up thongs
Mr. Bus Driver
Hurry it along
The bags are made in China
The thongs assembled in Macao
The girls on the beach are nearly naked
I wish I was with them now
It's hot and it's sweaty
In this warehouse, and between their legs
We are all frustrated people
Human powderkegs
Mr. Bus Driver
Hurry it along
My state caseworker
Will say he knew it all along
That I was unfit
That I do not belong
Mr. Bus Driver
Hurry it along
7. Chiropractic
You need chiropractic
Life-long chiropractic
Cradle-to-grave chiropractic
Now world-wide, chiropractic
My chiropractor is not a doctor
My chiropractor used to manage a McDonald's
Then he took a course so he could serve us best
My right leg he says, is longer than my left
In a storefront that used to be a yogurt shop
He performs treatments to get the pain to stop
Here he roughs you up until your bones snap
Insurance won't cover this, they're living in the past
Subluxation
Free orientation
Defensive video
Four X-rays, now we know
Constipation and depression, traced to your spine
Greeted by a pretty lady, two documents to sign
Three times weekly, in 9 months you should be well
Then it's once a week, until you die and go to Hell
8. Bring the Dead Boy Peace
People are always talking in this little town
We are its pride and its shame
So we come up in conversation now and again.
I knew something was wrong
When I overheard a Mormon elder at the Burger King
Talking about how to bring the dead boy peace
There was a drowning in Coalinga
An accidental death, the boy died
Now when this kind of thing happens
They all start talking about us even more
They say the dead boy's life was stolen
But we were willing to throw ours away
I have said time and time again
That our failed suicide pact was a mistake
But because we have not cut our hair
And joined up with the Mormon Church
There's always been this lingering feeling
That we think what we did was right
You can't bring the dead boy peace
By scowling at those of us who are alive
We didn't kill your son sorry please
You'll never bring the dead boy peace.
I didn't know the dead boy
But I placed a bouquet of spirulina on his grave
There's no hidden messages in our music
It's all printed there on the lyric sleeve
Pied pipers of death? I can barely breathe!
Now get off our cases please
9. Coalinga Love
Coalinga knows how to party
Coalinga knows how to party
Unlike the city
Of Avenal
Unlike the city
Of Kettleman City
Unlike the city
City of Kerman
We keep on rocking
From wheelchairs rolling
Let me welcome everybody to the center of the west
The city that's protected us as if it were a nest
The health care we receive here is the best
Pretty nurses shoot us up with winks suggesting sex
We were born here and died here yet we're still alive
Selling retread tires and colored ice to survive
We clip coupons on the weekend take 'em to the store
Double value on Tuesdays; so you save even more.
I've been in this town since before Taco Bell was serving
Back when the local food left your belly churning
But now we got chains and we're gonna use them
We record tracks in their motherfucking bathroom
It's all good
For the people in this town
Shut the fuck up,
The sky here isn't brown
Blow a gasket
As you pass on through
Your car'll never make it
You've got some spending to do
Coalinga knows how to party
Coalinga knows how to party
Unlike the city
Of Avenal
Unlike the city
Of Kettleman City
Unlike the city
City of Kerman
We keep on rocking
From wheelchairs rolling
Save us, save us please
save us save us
Save us save us please
save us please
Save us, save us please
save us save us
Save us save us please
save us please
Out on the streets of Coalinga
We still get stares
You think they'd be used to rockers
In metal wheelchairs
They've seen us in the paper
But still they're not all proud
Like that old man who sets his hearing aid too loud
He called the cops when he saw light still on
At Taco Bell at midnight he said he heard a sound
The police showed up and pulled the plug at a quarter past
We had just begun to lay down our latest tracks.
They busted our asses and hauled us off to jail
Charged with trespassing, Mrs. Johnson posted bail.
Now we gotta go to trial and defend ourselves
Fight these motherfucking attorneys from Taco Bell
Say what you say but locals came out on our behalf
Despite all these Kerman Christians
With their anti-metal tracts
We're still alive unlike Terry Kath
Pretty nurses in bra and panties
Give us sponge baths
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